We wear our winter coats at night, bathed in the glow from the campfire light. Cat Stevens sits on my left and St. Nicolas is on my right. Just like Lincoln, Marx, and Van Gogh, but you're hearing us on the radio. Dreaming of a day when nobody shaves, we're gonna take our secrets to our graves.

When they showed up, we turned our backs and dug our feet into the sand. "But it's cold out!" Well, we just laughed and we jumped right in!

Traded Blitzer for Gore back in 2004, and if it was just a shadow at 5:00 then we're gonna have to see some more. Bought all of Rogaine's stock, stay lookin' sharp like ZZ Top. Gotta grow it out as long as you can, 'cause every lady's crazy 'bout a thick bearded man. For every boy who wants to look grizzly: there's a girl who wants to get busy.

We are such shaggy beasts. We are a city in the dark. Our number grow and grow sure as the cold winds blow. There's no need to be pushy, just want our world beautiful and bushy.

Our governments secret plot divided those with beards and those with not. They grafted hair on Manson's face before going to Sharon Tate's place. We're just trying to clear our name, I'm sure that you'd do the same. But now is not the time to worry, just join the ranks of the full and furry.

"No dress shirts, no razorblades, no shaving cream, no close shaves... No dress shirts, no razorblades, no shaving cream, and no shallow graves!"

We are such shaggy beasts. We are a city in the dark. Our number grow and grow sure as the cold winds blow. There's no need to be pushy, just want our world beautiful and bushy.